


Sideways

by ABrighterDarkness



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Feels, Fluff, Getting Together, Hugs, M/M, Missions Gone Wrong, Post-Mission, Sam Wilson Feels, Steve Rogers Feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-13
Updated: 2021-01-13
Packaged: 2021-03-17 14:26:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28726575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ABrighterDarkness/pseuds/ABrighterDarkness
Summary: He had, of course, been on missions that had gone sideways before.  Bad intel, sudden changes in circumstances he couldn’t have planned ahead for, even going in distracted--both himself and others on whatever team he happened to be running the mission with.  Those things happened.But frankly, if this one had been anymore sideways it would have just been flipped completely upside down.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Sam Wilson
Comments: 9
Kudos: 29





	Sideways

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! It's been a bit since I've posted something non-event related, and I think this might be my first posting of the new year too. Huh. Happy New Year, I hope it's treating you all well so far! 
> 
> This one is written based off of [this twitter prompt.](https://twitter.com/SamSteveLove/status/1316115229944709126?s=20)

Steve sunk down on the edge of the small couch and braced his elbows on his knees with a quiet groan. He pressed his face into his hands for a long moment before shoving them back through his hair roughly and let them drop. That...was not how that was supposed to go.

He had, of course, been on missions that had gone sideways before. Bad intel, sudden changes in circumstances he couldn’t have planned ahead for, even going in distracted--both himself and others on whatever team he happened to be running the mission with. Those things happened. 

But frankly, if this one had been anymore sideways it would have just been flipped completely upside down. 

“Hey,” Sam said, bringing him out of his thoughts with a light nudge to his shoulder. Steve blinked up in question. “Go get yourself cleaned up before you settle. I’ll see what’s stashed in this place that looks edible before we switch off.”

Steve nodded and pushed back to his feet. Before he left the room, though, he paused mid step just in front of Sam. Steve took a moment to look him over, relieved that he was there and whole. Without thinking, he brought a hand up, gently brushing his thumb over the deep bruising that was already forming along Sam’s cheekbone and up toward his temple.

“Anything else?” he asked softly.

“More bruising no doubt but otherwise, I think I’m good,” Sam replied with a small upturn twist of his lips. “All things considered, we got pretty damn lucky.”

“Yeah,” Steve agreed, dropping his hand from Sam’s face but unable to bring himself to move just yet. “We’ll need to lay low here for a few days, make sure it’s actually safe before we try to make contact.”

“I figured,” Sam shrugged and stole a quick glance at the small, hideaway safe house. “S’pose there’s a lot worse places we could be waiting it out. We’ll be fine, Steve.”

“Right,” Steve nodded with a tired smile. He swallowed down anything else that he might have thought to say, shifting around Sam toward the bathroom. As he went he gave the house another cursory glance. It was small but Steve had lived in smaller. A single bedroom down the short hallway to the left, the bathroom on the direct opposite wall. What was intended to be the kitchen, living, and dining rooms behind him. The house was sparsely furnished with only the basics for furniture but he knew that it would be thoroughly stocked for whatever eventualities. Nat was meticulous like that.

He quickly shed his uniform, leaving it in a bulky pile on the tile floor. Steve washed quickly even as his mind wandered back to the mission. Poking and prodding at it from every angle he could come up with just trying to figure out how it went so wrong, so fast. Their intel should have been solid. It  _ was _ solid. The initial surveillance had collaborated the intelligence they’d gathered down to the minute. 

How had the expected number of enemy combatants more than doubled in the short time between their sweeps and deploying? And how did an unaffiliated splinter cell have enough manpower to lay that effective of a trap?

What was he missing?

Steve sighed and rinsed himself of the last of the dust, grime, and ash before carefully turning the water off again. Carefully because he was just agitated enough that anything less likely would have had him snapping the whole thing off without meaning to. 

_ No damaging the Safe Houses, Rogers, _ he thought to himself, shaking his head in a combination of amusement and annoyance. 

He dried and dressed with clothes that he left in a duffle bag that stayed permanently on the jet for times just like this. Plain but comfortable sweatpants and one of his undershirts. He snatched his filthy uniform off of the floor as he left the room. With absentminded movements, he stuffed the uniform into the duffle as best he could and dropped the bag onto the floor of the bedroom on his way back out to the main living area. 

Sam shot him an easy grin when he came into view and Steve was incapable of doing anything but returning it. “Feel better?” Sam asked knowingly.

“Doesn’t take much,” Steve said with a half-laugh. “No major damage either, before you ask.”

“Good,” Sam said with a nod, though he wasn’t entirely convinced if the way he did a quick searching scan over Steve from head to toe was any indication. “There’s all sorts of canned and jarred stuff. Obviously not going to have a whole lot of fresh just sitting around waiting to go bad.”

“I’m sure that we’ll make do,” Steve said easily. He smiled fondly, “Go on, Sam. Go get feeling human. I’ll sort out food.”

“Tell me again why that scares me?” Sam teased as he nudged past Steve toward the bathroom. 

“Because the majority of the food in this entire house is canned or preserved in some other way,” Steve smirked, he caught Sam’s hand as he drew even and squeezed lightly, revelling more than he cared to admit in the simple contact. 

“Right in your element then, I guess,” Sam said with a mock-grimace. He tightly returned the squeeze around Steve’s hand before pulling away and heading down the hallway.

Steve stayed put for a long moment, watching him go. 

He didn’t know what he’d have done if the sideways mission had gotten Sam more seriously injured or worse. He doubted that it would have been anything good. Sometimes, Steve had the nearly overwhelming urge to send Sam back home and do this messed up trail of missions on his own. If only to keep him safe. He knew Sam agreeing to that would be as likely as Steve agreeing to sitting sideline, which was to say not at all. And more than that, Steve had long since come to realize that he wanted Sam with him more than just about anything else. By his side and in the air flying over his head. In whatever way.

He sighed softly and shook off his habit of post-mission hyperfixation for the time being and forced himself to focus on opening the cabinets and small pantry attached to the kitchen. Steve scanned the contents curiously as he took stock. Definitely lots of canned food. The bright side was that he hadn’t had to struggle with jar lids in years. After a moment of contemplation he opened the lower drawers, relieved to find pots and pans. Well used and a little battered but more than usable.

Steve easily fell into the routine of throwing together something simple but hearty enough for both of them. When he was satisfied that everything was as good as it was going to get, Steve moved the pan to a cool burner and turned off the one he had been using. 

And then he frowned. 

He hadn’t heard the shower kick on, he realized belatedly. Steve felt a rush of uneasy concern wash over him.

Quickly washing and drying his hands, Steve moved through the small house and down the hall to check on Sam. From the far end of the hallway, he could see the door was still wide open, the light turned on and spilling into the hall. The shower wasn’t running and Steve couldn’t feel any damp heat in the air that might have suggested that he just missed it while he was distracted cooking. He took a few cautious steps forward until he was just adjacent to the door and felt his heart ache. 

Sam was barefooted and had gotten undressed down to his tacpants, pieces of his uniform discarded to the floor much like Steve had done with his own. But his hands were braced against the countertop, shoulders tense and rounded with his head hanging low. His breathing was slow and steady but in an artificial sort of way. As though he had to force it to stay that way and not without a lot of effort.

Steve made his last few steps noticeably heavier as he approached, not wanting to startle him. Especially not when he was already so clearly raw and not so soon after such a shitty operation. Though, when he rested a hand gently on the bare skin of Sam’s back, Sam still jolted, head snapping up sharply until his eyes met Steve’s in the mirror. 

Steve ran his hand up and then back down the length of Sam’s spine once before giving in to what he had wanted to do for  _ months. _ Winding his arm around Sam’s waist, his other arm joined the first and Steve tugged gently with a quiet “Come here,” until Sam stood upright and rested his weight back against Steve’s shoulder. Steve hooked his chin over Sam’s shoulder and just held on. 

After a brief moment, Sam relaxed more heavily into him. His head tipping to the side to rest against Steve’s and hands moving to lace their fingers together where Steve was wrapped around him. 

“We’re okay,” he murmured softly. “I got you.”

“Yeah,” Sam agreed, voice quiet and Steve could feel his slight nod against his own temple. “I know.”

Steve wasn’t positive which statement that was meant to address but he hoped that it was both. It was a kind of perfect that Steve didn’t ever think that he would be allowed to have. Just holding Sam like this, despite the less than pleasant reasonings that had prompted it. It was warming and bordering on necessary in a way that he hadn’t known was possible but made him want to hold on even tighter. Just, never let go. Steve tipped his chin just enough to press a kiss to Sam’s shoulder, pressing it firmly and letting it linger like he truly wanted to. 

Steve knew that it was telling, that little gesture. Possibly even more so than the hug. But then, so was the way that Sam was all but melting into Steve’s hold. Like maybe he had been itching and aching for the contact too. 

Steve slowly drew back to meet Sam’s eyes when he shifted against him, turning his head far enough to be able to see Steve clearly, chin tilting in a way that seemed expecting, or maybe inviting. Steve hesitated a brief moment before leaning in again, this time to press a soft kiss to Sam’s lips, watching closely for any sign that maybe he was misreading this. That maybe this wasn’t actually okay. 

He pulled back briefly and exhaled slow and shaky before tentatively pressing forward again and, this time, Sam met him in the middle. Steve gently tugged one hand free of Sam’s hold, using the hand instead to cup Sam’s face, holding him in place. This one lingered and so did the next. 

Steve loosened his hold when Sam slowly turned around, his hands gripping firmly onto Steve’s shoulders. He wondered if there was something he was meant to say just then. If there were typical words that were supposed to go along with this. If there were, he’d either never known them or they were entirely escaping him at the moment. Steve nudged the uncertainty aside and inched forward, closing what little space there was between them. He didn’t lack of words stop him from letting his eyes close and dipping in for another kiss, sinking into it fully.

He was delightfully breathless by the time they broke away and rested his forehead against Sam’s. Sam had wound up seated on the counter rather than being crowded against it, though Steve had only moved closer in response. Sam’s hands had slipped beneath the thin material of the tank top that Steve had thrown on after his shower, fingers digging just slightly into his back, keeping Steve pulled close. 

Steve hadn’t wanted to stop. It was only the memory of Sam’s painfully tense posture and carefully paced breathing when he had first found him that brought Steve back down to reality. He tilted his head and pressed his lips to Sam’s forehead then stood fully, not bothering to step back or give space unless it was asked of him. But the way Sam’s hands tightened against his back when he withdrew that little bit, Steve didn’t think that was going to be the case.

He let his fingertips trace lightly over Sam’s face, following the movement intently with his eyes. He licked his lips reflexively before breaking the comfortable silence. “Get your shower,” Steve said softly. “We’ll have some dinner and then--” he cut himself off briefly before pushing forward with his thought. “And then maybe you’ll let me hold you some more after.”

Sam laughed quietly, it was a tired laugh but a genuine one and Steve couldn’t help but smile at the sound of it. Sam tilted his head the short distance to look at him and gave a slow, almost lazy nod. “Think that just might be the best part of your whole plan.”

Steve grinned, small and fond. “Even better than hot water and food?”

“Considering both of those seem to be requiring more distance than a bit of snuggling?” Sam pointed out with the familiar grin that had drawn Steve in from day one.

“Just temporarily,” Steve assured him and he ducked to kiss him again, unable to resist now that he was seemingly allowed. When they broke, Steve smiled. “And I’ll make up for it with a lot of snuggles instead of a bit.”

“I’m going to have to hold you to that,” Sam agreed. He hesitated a moment then continued. “And not just...not just for today either.”

“Definitely not,” Steve smiled with a short laugh, winding his arms around Sam’s shoulders and hugging tightly. He tucked his head against Sam’s when his arms wound just as snug around Steve’s waist and spoke quietly just next to Sam’s ear. “I’ve been gone on you for ages, Sam. You can have as many snuggles and anything else you want, for as long as you want, as far as I’m concerned.”

Sam didn’t speak for a long moment and then his arms tightened the hug and then loosened enough for him to sit back and meet Steve’s eye again. “I’m definitely going to have to hold you to that.”

“Hope so,” Steve admitted. Reluctantly, he pulled back fully, walking backward until he bumped into the doorframe. “Go on, I’ll be out here when you’re done.”


End file.
